8lue's Writing
A Better Sedative

Fandom: Homestuck
Characters: Dirk Strider, Roxy Lalonde, Dave Strider
Pairing: DirkRoxy 
Summary: Alcohol isn’t always for the best.
Warnings: (I guess underage drinking?), AU

Written for this lovely lady for being a great friend and loving DirkRoxy just as much as I do. <3

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“Baby, why won’t you stop crying?!” The blonde slurs, looking over the edge of the crib at the matching blonde baby boy.

It was rather funny how all of this happened, the two blondes actually coming together and starting up a family. Roxy was rather surprised when Jane blurted out her feelings to Jake, the ebony girl getting overly emotional at the thought that she might lose her chance with Jake. The thing was, where did that leave their other friend? Where did it leave Dirk?

Roxy was rather okay with being the go to gal, aka the rebound girl. Dirk had said that their relationship was that of friends, and nothing more. Only after an accident, Roxy almost losing her life, did Dirk change his mind.

This girl was too important to him, he didn’t want to lose her for anything. She had been there for him through all of this, and what had he done for her? Nothing. He had treated her as a sister at best, but after seeing her unconscious on that bed.. he wasn’t upset because he almost lost his sister. No, he was upset because he almost lost someone so precious to him.

One extremely awkward confession and six years later, they were still together. Roxy’s drinking habit had diminished some, as per Dirk’s request, but it was still there. Most of the liquor was hidden, hoping to keep it away from the baby once he was able to wander around the house on his own. But this evening it was threatening to come back in full force because she simply couldn’t handle the amount of crying that this kid was doing. It was like he didn’t come with an off button or something. Why did Dirk have to pick tonight of all nights to go out? This was the first time that Roxy had been left alone with ths baby, with Dave. (Named after Dirk’s older brother for reasons he had yet to explain to her.)

“C’mon babe.” She poked at his stomach, her own body hanging over the side of the crib lazily as she attempted to think of a way to make the kid stop crying. “Are you upset? Stupid question. Why are you upset? You’re a baby, you don’t have anything to worry aboutttt.” She dragged out the last word in a mock attempt at a whine.

Really though, what did babies have to cry about? They had life made. No bills to pay, no appearances to keep up, they couldn’t even understand if they were called names and put down. Roxy sort of envied them, they had someone at their beck and call whenever they were upset, whenever they were hungry or thirsty..

“It’s not fair..” Even though she had been a kid at one point and time, she couldn’t recall it and therefore in her mind, she hadn’t been like all these other whining, crying babies. “Why can’t you tell me what you want? It’s not that hard if you can making that whining sound, just add to it geez.”

She stood up suddenly, nearly falling backwards, as she had a thought cross her brain. Whenever she was upset there was always one thing that made her feel better. Surely it would make Dave loads happier and maybe he would even stop crying for more than five minutes. “You just wait here, brat, Mama has something that will cure you of everything that bothers your tiny, infant brain.”

Making her way to one of the locket cabinets, she pulled out her necklace which dawned a small key on it. It took a few times, but she was able to unlock the lock and open the cabinet door. She moved around a few bottles, muttering disagreements and shaking her head as she attempted to find just the thing.

“Ah-ha! There’s mama’s other baby!” Roxy exclaimed, pulling out an almost empty bottle of rum.

After uncorking it and taking a swig, she made her way back to the nursery, placing her finger in the bottle and soaking it in the alcohol. She licked her lips, savouring the taste, as she moved to stand above the crib once more. Her finger popped out of the bottle with a small noise, the blonde baby squirming and crying away. Of course she knew better than to give the child an entire swig of the stuff, plus why would she waste her precious baby? It was slow and steady, but she dragged her rum coated finger around the edge of Dave’s lips, grinning all the while.

“There we go. You’ll feel so much better now, baby. This allllllways helps mama, so she’s absolutely positive that it’ll help you.”

And of course, it did. Dave settling down, his crying toning down into a soft whimper as Roxy merely grinned at her success. What did she said? Come now, she was an adult who knew her way about the ways and wonders of alcohol! It was perfect!

Except not.

“Roxy!” Dirk’s voice was louder than it should’ve been, as it should be for coming home to find your wife holding a bottle of alcohol over the crib of your child. “Just what in the fucking hell do you think you’re doing?”

She looks over, her accomplished grin still on her face. “He was cryin’ so I got him to shut up. Wasn’t all too hard since I know exactly the thing to cure-“

“You gave him alcohol? I knew you were blonde, Roxy, but this is completely out of your league. What were you thinking? Alcohol can kill him!” He leaned over the crib, wiping at Dave’s lips in an attempt to take away whatever was left. Dirk’s hands are now on her shoulders, pulling her up and staring hard into her eyes, his signature shades long since discarded. It only added to the seriousness of the moment.

Her eyes widened, the bottle dropping to the floor as she frantically looked over at the now sleeping baby. “There’s no way. It can’t kill him unless he has a lot. C’mon, Dirk, he’s my kid, a small bit of rum won’t kill him.”

“It doesn’t work like that, babe. He’s a baby, he doesn’t have the same immune system and all that other good shit that you and I do. His tiny body cannot handle the things that our bodies can, it can really mess him up, even kill him. Do you understand that? There are other things that you can do to stop him from crying. Like, holding him, checking to see if he needs to be changed, feeding him if needed.”

Roxy goes quiet, and it takes Dirk a few ticks to figure out that she’s crying. Her head is hung and she’s hiccupping, shit it’s like she’s going to go into another emotional breakdown. Keeping his arm around her, Dirk leads her out, quietly shutting the door to Dave’s room. He leads her into their own room, setting her down on the bed and sitting next to her.

“Roxy, shit, come on, stop crying. This was a warning, he should be fine, I hope. Oh fuck..”

The woman is hyperventilating now, shaking in his arms. He can barely make out the words that she’s forcing out, but he knows that she’s apologizing.

“I can’t do this, Dirk. I can’t. I’m not fit to be a mother, I’m not meant to be a mother. I’ve never been stable, so what the hell am I doing trying to raise a kid? You were right. You’ve always been right. I’ve got no business bringing up a kid.” She manages to get out, her arms wrapping around him and holding onto him like a lifeline.

“I was fifteen when I said that, I wasn’t thinking about what life would be like if there really were kids in the picture. But now that we’re in the part in life, I don’t want you giving up. What happened to the girl I grew up with? You can’t give up, Roxy, I won’t let you give up. I’m not that confident as a parent, I’m so scared that I’m going to do something wrong and the little dude is going to get hurt.” His grip around her tightens, his eyes closing as he tries to calm her down. Soothing touches, a hand running through her hair, simply letting her cry it out of her system.

Dirk had an idea that it might’ve had something to do with the lack of alcohol in her system, or maybe because that bottle of rum was empty by the time he arrived. Either way, she needed to get it out, especially if it had been weighing on her mind this entire time.

“Maybe, if we work together, help each other when we’re feeling down and unconfident, we might be able to pull this off. What do you say, Ro?”

The woman lifted her head, seeing the softest almost uncatchable smile on her husband’s lips before locking her pink eyes with his orange ones. Her own lips tugged up, into a small smile as she leaned up, muttering against his lips, “Sounds like a deal. Let’s both try our best, and if it means anything, I’ve always thought you were a better parent than I could ever be…”

“According to the statistics, that’s one hundred percent true.” Was his quick reply, pecking her lips before she was able to scoff.

Thanks. That just encourages me so much.”

“Anytime, babe. But for what it’s worth, I think if you try, you can be a great mother.”

Her lips were pressed against his in an instant, laughing into the kiss as the two of them fell back against the bed.